I know how much SarahC loves puppies, so I'm gonna post up pictures of my new doggie!
Just wanna make Sarah go "awwwwww"...
Well if u didn't, at least I did. hehe
Ok...back to c4. Im tired of this shit...=.='
As I stood in front of the translucent fridge that encased the white wine bottles, a soft reflection of myself was carved. With hair tightly pulled back, white collar shirt neatly pressed,and a crisp white apron clinging onto my hip-I tilted my head to the side and smiled quietly. I liked what I see.
I liked it because I had a sense of identity that I have been looking for and at that moment I was a passionate waitress.
But as time passes by, that same sense of identity diminished little by little.
"This is not who I want to be and this is not what I want to do any longer", says the voice in my head.
Doubts lingered in my head but it was never enough to spur a decision. And so I lingered and lingered in the restaurant.
Then, one fine day arrived and it changed everything. Gently I walked around guests that were attending a cocktail party in my restaurant and offered them tid bits from my tray. I flashed a big smile along with a sharp eye contact to initiate. I finished up my tid bits faster than the rest and glad that I won this time around. Feeling a little tired, so I stood at the bar and looked into the dimly lit room that were flooded by confident and well-dressed youngsters and oldies alike. Air of aristocracy surrounded them and passionate conversations continued as they slowly sipped in their wines. A surge of envy flooded my heart and a big part of me wants to be inside rather than being outside. At that point, I knew I had enough.
Everybody around me is pursuing their passion day by day and here I stood serving people that I don't know. I failed to recall my passion. I was lost and asked myself, "Who am I now that I've forgotten my passion?"
I was a traveller. A crazy traveller who would give any chance to embark on the journey of the unknown. A traveller who would empty herself upon each journey just so that she could come back soaked with the foreign culture and idealogies. A traveller who loves getting lost along the way as she believes its the journey that matters and not the destination.
As soon as she found out all the years she planted this dream were futile, she lost her sense of identity. Even this job was supposed to serve her big travelling dreams.
As I type all these words, I am still asking myself who am I now if I'm no longer passionate? I am a student? A daughter? A sister or a girlfriend?
It doesn't matter with what term your normally associate yourself with but most importantly, you must be passionate in it.
So who the fuck am I now?
Ok...back to c4. Im tired of this shit...=.='
